Safe

Squinting at the numbers on the combination lock for our storage shed, I thought I would be able to feel in the late twilight the hidden grinding that signals the moments to change directions, then stop and pull. But it didn't open, and I had to turn again, squinting harder and moving slower.

I don't even know what the inside of a combination lock looks like.

It could have been a beautiful, allegorical mystery, but then I went and looked it up:
http://www.howstuffworks.com/inside-lock.htm

Or the long version, with animation and (on the second page) detailed instructions on "high road" safecracking:
http://home.howstuffworks.com/safecracking.htm

But if you're short on time, just read The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay. You won't learn how to pick locks, but sometimes pretending is better anyway.

Jesus Christ

2's alter ego is a fuzzy stuffed bear, entirely blue. Sam has, in the past two or three months, developed a complex personality and is prone to extremes. For example, he "always sleeps," except when he "never sleeps."

Today we were late for her summer preschool program because of an altercation that climaxed with her hitting me and me carrying her screaming to her room.

Tears, kisses, we're on the bike to school. The little voice behind my head (amazingly clear, considering the bike is speeding along) says, "Sam hits me and I don't get mad."